On the Same Team

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” – Ephesians 5:21 

Have you ever felt like you and your spouse are on different teams? Perhaps you’ve known seasons of deep intimacy, but you’ve also weathered challenges, feeling like you’re heading in two different directions. It happens, and it’s okay to acknowledge it. But here’s the thing – marriage isn’t a competition. It’s a partnership. 

In Ephesians 5:21, the Bible encourages us to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” It’s not about one person being the winner and the other the loser. It’s about both partners willingly submitting to each other, recognizing strengths and weaknesses, and working together toward a common goal. 

When you argue, neither of you is truly winning. Why? Because you’re not opponents; you’re teammates. You’re on the same side, striving for a shared vision of a strong and thriving marriage. Competing against each other only leaves both of you feeling defeated. 

So, how do you move from competing to cooperating in your marriage? 

Understand each other’s perspective when conflicts arise. Instead of focusing on proving a point, aim to understand your partner’s feelings and concerns. Effective communication is the key to cooperation. 

Remember that your marriage is more important than winning an argument. Prioritize the health of your relationship over being right. Choose to let go of the need to win and, instead, focus on finding solutions that strengthen your bond. 

Recognize and celebrate the differences between you and your spouse. Unity doesn’t mean uniformity. It’s about appreciating each other’s unique strengths, weaknesses, and perspectives, and finding ways to complement one another. 

Invite God into the midst of your marital challenges. Pray together, seeking His guidance and wisdom. Surrendering to God as a couple helps to align your hearts and perspectives, fostering a sense of unity. 

In the grand scheme of marriage, you’re not opponents; you’re a team. When you’re both on the same side, cooperating and supporting each other, the victories are sweeter, and the challenges are more manageable. Remember, you’re not competing – you’re in this together. 

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bible verse

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)

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