Confronting Selfishness in Marriage

“Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.” – Romans 14:19  

Have you ever found yourself in the midst of a storm within your marriage? The slightest of selfishness can be a destructive force, building walls of sinfulness and separation that threaten the very foundation of our relationships. 

It’s a common human tendency to shy away when the storm hits. Selfishness, left unchecked, leads us down a path of sinfulness and separation. We begin to withdraw, avoiding meaningful conversations and concealing our thoughts and emotions. Why? Because the fear of judgment and condemnation looms large. 

In these moments, transparency becomes a casualty. The very essence of marriage, the sacred bond built on openness and vulnerability, becomes compromised. We erect walls to protect ourselves from the perceived ugliness of our selfishness, unknowingly pushing our partners further away. 

Yet, the walls we build in an attempt to shield ourselves only serve to deepen the enmity between spouses. The longer we let selfishness fester, the more bricks we add to the wall that divides us. It’s a dangerous cycle that threatens the unity and intimacy we once cherished. 

Romans 14:19 urges us to make every effort to do what leads to peace and mutual edification. Confronting our selfishness is a vital step toward breaking down the walls that hinder the closeness we crave. It requires humility, self-reflection, and a commitment to mutual growth. 

Have you found yourself at a point where the storm in your marriage has built up walls? It’s not uncommon, and it’s never too late to start tearing them down. Begin by acknowledging the presence of selfishness and sinfulness, and take the courageous step of addressing them together. 

Marriage is a journey of growth, and storms will come. Let’s face them hand in hand, dismantling the walls that threaten our intimacy. By confronting selfishness, we create a space for love and understanding to flourish. 

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bible verse

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)

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